The Passport Lady

So yesterday afternoon after school, I decided I would finally stop putting it off and go apply for my Passport. I went to the Court House (and yes, I figured that one out on my own) and walked through the metal detector to ride the elevator up to the 2nd floor to meet "The Passport Lady". As I walked in, I was unsure if I was in the right place at first, but then I pulled out my stuff and the PL (Passport Lady) asked how she could help me. I gave her the application form that Mama and I filled out. However, I had messed up on it. She made it clear to me that I signed below the line that said "Do Not Sign Below This Line". So, I then had to prove to her that that was MY signature and my driver's license number. She also mentioned to me that it was a good thing that I didn't write in blue ink (at least I got something right!).After I leaped over that hurdle and proved to her that I am none other than Lauren J. Lovelace, she asked to see my two photographs for my passport picture. She took one look at them and looked back up at me and said in her country voice, "Honey, I'm sorry but these are too dark... and, you're not supposed to wear white." As I gave her the face of "are you kidding me!", she showed them to her coworkers to see make sure they all agreed with her. So I am up to 2 strikes with the PL. Next, she says, "just go make you some new photographs and I'll keep your application here. Now, that will be $25 application fee and $75 for the passport." I handed her the Alabama Alumni credit card that mom and dad take care of and surprise, surprise, her mouth opened again... "We don't take credit cards, only cash or check for the application fee and a check or money order for the passport." So, I looked at her with my big green "shut the blank up" eyes and said, "well, there is no money in my checking account right now and it's 2009 so I have no cash on me. I guess I will have to bring the money by next week with my new photographs." Needless to say, my will to conquer my procrastination was not going well. So I said, "Let me write down all the things I need to bring with me next week so we won't have to go through this again." She handed me a blue post-it note and a pen and began to tell me what to list on my post-it. Somehow in her attempt to remind me of the list she mentioned that I needed a copy of my birth certificate. I am just thankful that we didn't get too far in this passport process for her to mock me for that. As I completed my list, she began to hand me my application so I could bring it back next week, but she chimed in saying, "I'd better hold on to this... I already notarized it and can't let you have it after I've done that... but you can hold on to your old passport." I began to pack all my things up and because I am the sweet southern girl I am, I said to her, "Thanks for your help and I'll see you next week." ...til the Passport Lady and I meet again...